Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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