just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
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