It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
accomplished twins. life is a go
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
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