No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Randomize
