Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Watching her eat just hurts me
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
