Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize