Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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