So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
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