You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
HOW DID I LET MYSELF GET SUCKED IN HE HAS A PENIS FOR PETE'S SAKE.
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