am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
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