I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
