Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
You're always so late and I'm always so drunk.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize
