So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Just because you got dumped by some loser doeant mean you need Jesus. It just means you need better friends and some booze
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