yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
There are more dirty dishes in my bed then in the kitchen. Have I lost at life?
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
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