Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize