so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Randomize
