That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
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