i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
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Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
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You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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