Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
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its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
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The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
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