Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
