Sponge bath it is.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
