I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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