Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
