you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
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