You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
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