Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I just sucked dick on a ferry
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
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