You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize
