I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Randomize
