I puked a lego.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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