Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Randomize
