its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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