I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
You smell like stripper and shame
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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