Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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