You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Randomize
