I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Green mimosas i think yes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
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