dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
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He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
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All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex