Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Randomize