after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Houston, we have a squirter
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
