The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize