covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
At what point did I decide it would be a good idea to fill my contact case with vodka
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
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