it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Randomize
