I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
