Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Randomize
