I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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