Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
Randomize
