Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
