ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I mean I'm not worried about us not getting wasted. I'm more worried that I'll be doing a Boris yeltzen impression by 1030.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize