It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
Randomize
