bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
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