I cannot find my penis.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
the day after is always just damage control
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Randomize