we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Randomize
