There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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