the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
It's shark week go big or go home
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
She took me to ER. She says thought it was a squirtgun filled with vodka and she was 'marking me for later.' Thank god it's a flesh wound, and we're cool and going to date.
gtg, the cops are here
Randomize
